Michael Lohan, Kate Major Looking to Procreate So Hard; Lindsay and Dina Lohan Nauseated

Michael Lohan and Kate Major not only got engaged, they're wasting no time trying for a kid. Mike says they "practice at least four times a night" in fact.

As if the mere engagement weren't gross enough to his last family.

"Kate wants a baby. Since I'm getting no younger, we practice at least four times a night," he tells TV Guide about his fiancée, but with one minor caveat:

"We agreed that if she does get pregnant, one is enough."

Probably for the best, given how the last batch turned out.

Michael Lohan, who turns 50 this month, has four children with ex-wife Dina, including helpless, broke train wreck Lindsay Lohan and JV version Ali Lohan.

That's how many times we tried to conceive by noon!

Kate Major, who at 27 is just a few years older than Lindsay, had a short relationship with Michael Lohan’s friend, Jon Gosselin. Hey, anything's a step up.

The two got engaged Easter weekend after dating about half a year. A place and date have not been set, but they're looking at December on Long Island.

Two people Mike probably won't see there? His previous wife and his eldest daughter. “It’s certainly a marriage made in tabloid heaven,” Dina Lohan said.

“Kate dated Hailey Glassman’s ex, then is best friends with Michael’s ex [Erin Muller], now she’s engaged to Michael. It all sounds a bit incestuous to me.”

“Where he’s finding money for weddings, engagement rings, I don’t know. He’s nine months behind on child support... pay for the kids you already have.”

Lindsay Lohan was more succinct, though no less repulsed by the news.

"I'm gonna vomit!" she told Us. "I so didn't need that info... yuck!"