Kate Gosselin will be one of the contestants on the upcoming season of Dancing With the Stars, according to reports. This poses an interesting dilemma:

How do they even introduce her on the show? Mother of eight? Bitchy single former reality star? Shameless, self-promoting author with awful hair?

In any case, the official Dancing With the Stars cast announcement will be made this evening as a cross-promotion with The Bachelor season finale.

"I want to laugh at myself. I so cannot dance. It would be a terribly sad sight," said the grating mother of eight on the Jay Leno Show recently.

Which begs the question: what would Gosselin do with her kids during the hours of grueling daily rehearsals for the reality competition show?

FEAR THE PORCUPINE: Whatever that is on her head, it is a force to be reckoned with as Kate Gosselin is ready to kick ass and take names on Dancing with the Stars.

She will actually prepare her routines in Pennsylvania, near where she lives, instead of in the show's rehearsal studios on the West Coast, according to sources:

"Kate's the kind of woman who will do whatever is necessary for her children. It's great for her to be on the show, but only in a way that benefits her family."

The show was willing to make such a concession since producers believe she will be a ratings bonanza for Dancing with the Stars, and they're probably right.

Kate is now the primary breadwinner for her brood, as the legal battle waged by Jon Gosselin against TLC ate up a big chunk of his money - and notoriety.

He can't do any more TV appearances now until they cut him loose. Which pretty much takes away his only source of revenue - being a douche, but on TV.