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The Hills Recap: "Can't Always Get What You Want"

On The Hills this week, Heidi worried about how Spencer doesn't want kids, while tension escalated between Jayde Nicole and Kristin Cavallari over Brody Jenner.

As always, The Hollywood Gossip editors look back at the major developments on Tuesday's episode of The Hills, awarding and deducting points as we see fit ...

Brody on Kristin's plan to meet Jayde Nicole: "You're out of your mind! She just tried to kill you." Plus 5, because that's literally true, but he says it so nonchalantly.

Heidi Montag's therapist tries to tell her that pulling the goalie on Spencer Pratt isn't the most sound idea. Minus 4 because Heidi needed a therapist to tell her this.

Brody's bro Taylor tells him he's more fun when he's around Kristin than he is around Jayde. Plus 3, because the lack of violent altercations does go a long way.

As if Kristin's actions weren't 100 percent scripted, Jayde rips her for being "in town for a month" and says she needs to "go back where she came from." Minus 6.

Kristin to Jayde: "Well, then you might want to keep his leash a little tighter, Jayde." Seconds later: "You're, like, such a bitch, Jayde." Burn and burn! Plus 7.

Jayde Nicole Bikini PhotoBrody Jenner ToplessBikini Pic of Kristin Cavallari

Brody Jenner ex-girlfriends Jayde Nicole and Kristin Cavallari square off.

Fake friendship/lunch date alert x2: Lo-Kristin and Audrina-Heidi! Minus 4.

Heidi outlines her plan to stop taking her birth control to Audrina, whose enormous forehead expands to even more epic proportions at this lunacy. Plus 3.

Man, Jayde is really unstable. So much so that Brody Jenner says he'll "jump off a building" if he has to argue with her one more time. Good sign. Minus 2.

Despite the fact that she appears more bipolar by the second, Brody decides he wants to stay with Jayde! Plus 6 for something we actually didn't see coming.

Kristin laments that she's always caught in the middle - first Audrina and Justin, now Brody and Jayde, when she's doing it all on freaking purpose! Minus 9.

Even Justin-Bobby's voicemail is garbled and undecipherable. Plus 2.

Umm, was that an actual normal dinner conversation and married couple moment from Speidi? Even, because we're too shocked to rate it one way or the other.

TOTAL: +1! SEASON TOTAL: +78! Mixed reviews this week, because the Speidi plot is getting old, and a meddling Kristin Cavallari can't expect us to care about her hurt feelings, even if Jayde is certifiably insane. Speaking of ...

Whose side are you on?

Team Kristin!
Team Jayde!
View Results

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10 Comments

  1. Aurora Says:

    LOVE these re-caps...Kristen is just too full of herself...love to hate Nicole coz she has crazy eyes and is just generally insanee

  2. CRAZYB Says:

    WHY WHY WHY WOULD BRODY GET BACK WITH JAYDE?????????????? YUCK SHE IS SO UGLY I HATE HER!!! KRISTIN AND BRODY LOOK SO MUCH BETTER TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!! KICK JAYDES ASS KRISTIN!!

  3. CRAZYB Says:

    WHY WHY WHY WOULD BRODY GET BACK WITH JAYDE?????????????? YUCK SHE IS SO UGLY I HATE HER!!! KRISTIN AND BRODY LOOK SO MUCH BETTER TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!!!! KICK JAYDES ASS KRISTIN!!

  4. b o s s ! Says:

    wow CRAZYB your username is certainly appropriate

  5. emilia Says:

    this is pathetic, jayde and brody were together all along, it's all over their Twitters that they were out filming together, then out at clubs. and then if you look at the tabloid pictures of them coming out of places it was when they were filming these scenes. the hills has had it's time now it wasnt as bad with lauren but now its all set up drama, you can tell by the way they speak about things because they aren't certain of what to say

  6. justlovelyy Says:

    I hate krisin. cant believe she use to be my favorite.

  7. kristin sucks ass! Says:

    CrazyB is that you Kristin?

  8. CRAZYB Says:

    BAHAHA........

  9. EvenCrazierB Says:

    Kristin is so far up her own backside. Nobody likes her, she may be pretty but she is such a bitch and thinks all the boys will fall at her feet. Bring back Lauren someone everyone loved. Jayde if I were you I would smack Kirstin good & proper cause she is after Brody big style.

  10. alice Says:

    In those pictures, Kristen looks so much nicer!
    i am loving the hills!!
    +78 is actually really good too!

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