Kate Gosselin Regrets Televised Emasculation of Jon

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Displaying rare humanity and perspective, Kate Gosselin said she isn't proud of the Jon & Kate Plus 8 moments which she spent basically castrating hubby Jon.

"I was very hard on him. I would never deny that," she said on the TLC special Kate: Her Story. "I felt very much like a lot of weight rested on my shoulders."

"I was wrong to treat him that way," Kate Gosselin added. "Was it good, healthy and wonderful? No. Am I proud of those moments that were captured? No."

Those moments were what initially had fans playing for Team Jon in the early stages of the couple's split, before new Jon became the world's biggest d-bag.

"I still wake up every day, and I think the phone will ring," Kate began, taking a long pause before she continued, voice cracking, "and it'll be the old Jon."

Below are more excerpts from this very special interview ...

On how they drifted apart. "Our goals just very much changed. My goals didn't change as a mom. I just think somewhere along the line, his goals changed."

On when she knew it was over: "I think I was on a plane coming home from somewhere and I remember thinking, We're not going to recover from this."

On the possibly exploitative nature of Jon and Kate Plus 8: "As someone who laid on bed rest from 7 to 30 weeks, who fought for every second of their existence, I can tell you there is nothing that would force me to put them in harm's way."

On why she doesn't quit while she's ahead: "We can't turn life off. I can't turn life off. In the last nine, 10 months, it's gotten really crazy and I can't seem to get away from it at this point. My goal in all this is I just want peace for my kids."

On why doesn't she pull the plug on the spotlight right now: "We're too far gone. Stepping out of the spotlight when it's prudent to do so is a good thing."

On the rumor she had an affair with her bodyguard, Steve Neild, earlier this year: "So unthinkable to me that to have to think about it makes me sick."

On why she needs a bodyguard: "People have a lot of contempt and hate toward me and at the end of the day, I need to come home safe to my kids."

On Jon's increasingly suspect personal life: "We do [talk] where it relates to the kids. As far as dating goes, I've never, ever broached the subject with him."

Follow the jump for a clip of Kate's interview last night ...

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I don't feel sorry for Kate. She pushed her husband away! She really wants to be in the spotlight. Its ridiculous that she tries to get sympathy.

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Kate has clearly left the door open for him to come home.

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I think Jon needs to grow up...why all of a sudden it's not in the best interest of the children to do the reality show...maybe cause jon is out?? He did so much damage that the whole show is finished...how the hell did he get ahead if it wasn't for the show? He would have NEVER been able to afford to take care of these children..he was damn lucky to get the reality show and all it's perks and freebies...he had to be immature (which is why Kate bashed him all the time..SHE had all the responsiblity and organization to do) he ruined it for everyone with his immature attitude and self hate...JON you should have just faded off into the sunset to live your childish life with your little girlfriend...and leave Kate alone to handle the children IT'S OBVIOUS KATE HAS BEEN CARRYING THE LOAD ALL THIS TIME.. WITH ONE LESS "CHILD" -(JON) to look after maybe her life will finally have some peace...

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I pray each day that Jon and Kate will use the grace that God is giving them to become a complete family once again and to get back to loving each other 100 million %.

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Maybe their marriage would have been saved if their life was not out in public... just a thought.

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Wish both Jon and Kate would just Go Away! What a waste of press.

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I empathize with Kate when she said that everyday she wakes up and hopes that Jon will be the old Jon. It seems like he has changed so much.

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When it all boils down you basically have two not so mature adults who can't really handle the fame. That is reality. It's not easy. They both let their egos go to their heads. The money was fantastic, their kids were happy, they were on easy street. Yet reality has to pop in at some time. You can't mix fantasy and reality without some issues, unless you are meant for this. They both made the mistake of handling their private issues in a public manner. This was supposed to be a family show, they didn't need to continue their problems publicly. I think with Jon and Kate their is a fine line between what is real and private and what is publicity/etc. STOP yourselves from going in front of a camera!! Deal with this like NORMAL people, in private. Amen.

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I agree with MAria...for idiots to justify Jon's behavior because Kate might have been too harsh to hi, on television...well, they are doin just what Jon has been trying to get them to do, make him the inoocent victim. He married Kate, he even said she has always been serious and mature, with an extremely dry sense of humor...She did not change. He is a jerk! Remember when he made up those lies about Kate having the affair, when he left her & the kids...when the truth was that he was and had been screwing around on his family. What a sleazebag, for anyone to wish him well is stupid!!

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To June - it is obvious you did not watch all of the episodes. Jon was equally rude and hateful to Kate. Making fun of her stomach, how she dressed, the color of her hair. Oh how about the time he said 'Kate when are you gonna take the stick out?' which was said in front of the children. They both disrespected each other. Despite that, until the end of season 4 you saw a couple that loved each other. Not until Jon decided he wanted his twentys back and started going to bars and womanizing did you see her move away from him on the interview chair.

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