Jennifer Aniston is Going to Die Alone!

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In doing the media rounds for her new movie Love Happens, Jennifer Aniston has said she still believes in love and that she will one day find "The One."

That hasn't stopped celebrity gossip publications from tripping over one another to report that she's a lonely, pathetic, desperate middle-aged hag, though.

Last night, The Soup suggested Us, In Touch, Star and Life & Style join forces to create a new magazine, Jennifer Aniston is Going to Die Alone Weekly.

Who wouldn't want 52 issues a year jam packed with made-up sources talking about an obviously fat and crying woman plotting revenge on Angelina ...

If you call 1-800-55-LOSER now, you will even get a bonus subscription to Jessica Simpson Looks Fat Weekly. That's over 5,000 pages per year of unflattering Jessica Simpson pictures at over 80 percent off the cover price!

What a steal.

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Jen is stunning and any real man would marry her in a New York second


Jennifer Aniston should die.


LOL. Her man was Brad Pitt. If da bitch wasnt so busy being Rachel and shit, she could have had him right now instead of Saint Angie. What a loser bitch! She cannot keep no man. They want her for her pussy.


People need to seriously leave her alone already. It's getting old fast, stupid tabloids


Wow, It's absolutely SICK how people who are probably HAGS themselves pick on beautiful popular people. Why? What makes you want to do a story on someone who got a divorce and takes time before they settle down with another person as opposed to - Oh I don't know - starving kids in Africa, or someone's Drug Binge even! Tell you what's PATHETIC: the losers who write nasty shit like this.


I want 2b w' her evry single breath i take if c wants :)


How can anybody say that a person is going to die alone? It's the most evil thing i've ever heard! And even if you think that way, that's not a reason why it should be a big new...Besides she's such a sweet person, so funny and incredibly beautiful...Really, really mean. Just leave her alone and maybe then you won't get bored of hearing from her...


Well, we Should all pray that Brad will never leave Angelina. B/c Angelina made a stereotype of a woman that Brad leaves behind. His ex is not enough. That's why he looks for a better one who can full fill his needs. Since Brad trashes a woman nobody should date her. If anybody dare to date then something must be wrong with that man. He is probably gay or promoting his movie. His ex should be a looser.
Well as I said let's hope Brad will never leave Angie. The minute that happens that's the title she is gonna get. I guess Angie knows it really well already. Maybe another baby should be a solution. What do you think????


Maybe she should try to die in a plain crash or be on the beach when a Tsunami arrives....that way she cant EVER die alone!!!


I loved the video. They give a very good answer to all the tabloids lies about Jen's being lonely, misserable, and being old, fat...etc
It's funny when an article is written by kiss a** Brangelina, they do not show your comment. They try to hide them. They don't want people to know what actually people think and they only post the greats things said about Brangelina. You can really tell if an article is milked by Brangelina, they are 3 pages long seems like written from an objective perspective but trashes Jen, Megan or anybody else Angie hates. they are about their movies on the cover but actually lies about their personal life.