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Fans of staged nonsense reality TV can expect major changes when new episodes of The Hills start up next month – beginning with the MTV series’ schedule.

The Hills’ new season will begin September 29, moving from Monday nights to Tuesdays. It will air at 10 p.m. followed by spinoff The City at 10:30.

Liz Gateley, Senior V.P. of MTV and executive producer of both shows, says that the new day is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to changes.

As we know, Kristin Cavallari has replaced Lauren Conrad.

You Know What You Did
(MTV)

Kristin Cavallari has brought new life,” Gateley says of the Laguna Beach star, who was recruited to create fake drama among cast members she would never otherwise hang out with after having gone MIA for the past three years.

“She is the same Kristin we know and love – not afraid to mix things up. Her presence has really changed every dynamic within The Hills cast, especially since we’re paying Kristin to drive a wedge between Audrina Patridge and Justin-Bobby.”

Kristin Cavallari is ready to stir up fake tensions like no other.

As for Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt?

“Heidi and Spencer will be entering some interesting new territory of acting like they are seriously considering parenthood,” she says (someone kill us now).

Three thousand miles away in NYC, former Hills co-star Whitney Port will be dealing with a new boss, Gateley adds: “A lot has changed in The City.

“We shifted the focus of the show significantly from a relationship drama to a workplace drama. [Olivia Palermo] has a new job and an amazing new boss at Elle. Whitney Port is focused a lot more on her work now that she’s single.”

“Kelly Cutrone – who I love – takes on a much bigger role in the show. The show feels much more like a reality Devil Wears Prada. Our whole shooting style changed. You’ll see much more action and less people sitting and talking.”

“There are fireworks on the highly exaggerated jobs constantly. It’s very exciting and fun to watch what it’s like to work in the world of New York fashion.”

Because her “relationship drama” reality series was painfully boring, The City’s Whitney Port is now starring in a “workplace drama.” This stuff is totally not staged.