The Hills are Alive ... with the Sound of 20-30 Heidi Montag Orgasms a Day

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If you think the headline above is too much information, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are just getting started. Just what you wanted, we know.

In addition to Heidi Montag Playboy photos, the men's magazine has treated us to an interview, conducted by Spencer, in which his better half reveals a lot about plastic surgery, former co-star Lauren Conrad, and of course, boning.

Some nauseating excerpts ...

Heidi to Spencer, on their sex life:

“I knew what sex was, but when I met you I entered a new realm of understanding, from fantasy to love, to experience a day with 20-30 orgasms. Before you, sex was just something that happened. Now it’s something I look forward to every minute."

Try to turn away from the keyboard as you vomit.

Heidi Pratt in Playboy

Spencer, on watching Heidi's Playboy cover shoot:

“It was f*%king torture! I got the biggest case of blue balls in history. I wanted to shut down production after the outfit change so I could enjoy you all to myself."

"I suggest they bring something like that to Guantanamo Bay. Who needs waterboarding when you can have Heidi Montag posing in these outfits in front of you, in front of the ocean, and not be able to make a move on her? I’m not kidding.”

Heidi, on shopping for fake boobs:

"I wanted the best, so I sat down and flipped through some Playboys. The women are so hot. Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra, Marilyn Monroe, all the Playmates."

Spencer, on Heidi suggesting she enlarge her fake boobs even more:

“Don’t do it for me. I think you have the best custom made breasts in the world right now. I don’t need any changes. I’m already driving a Bugatti every day.”

Heidi, on Lauren Conrad:

“The millions of people waiting for season six of The Hills love us. It’s not about Lauren Conrad, because she’s not even on the show now. Which is fine with me.”


she is so disgusting..ughhh!! shes even flaunting with shit all over her body.. *barf*


yuck that is the most iky thing ever


SHES FAKE inside and out. disgusting her and spencer..get a life!


Speidi-Blue-Balls is his new nick name....spread the word!


The millions of people waiting for season 6 of The Hills are waiting to see Kristen Cavalleri not Speidi. My guess is that the Hills will not be making a 7th season and that Speidi will fade into the background never to be heard from again. At least I hope that's what happens. I expect their next big news day after the show is canceled will be about their divorce.


she is ugly


bit of vomit there
she makes me sickk
whats with all the mud
oh please a dog would luck betta
than here and coverd up in mud!!!!!


Someone should tell this woman it's not sexy to have that stupid look on her face. I understand that it's hard to not look stupid when you're her, but a photographer could at least help her...


Yeah and while having her adams aple removed she should get herm penis cut off too.


Her next plastic surgery, she should have her adams apple removed

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Heidi Montag Biography

Heidi Montag Boob Job!
Ah, Heidi Montag. The controversial, plastic, duck-lipped, attention-loving blonde is a co-star on MTV's hit reality series, The Hills,... More »
Crested Butte, Colorado
Full Name
Heidi Montag

Heidi Montag Quotes

I used to be so strong, I used to be able to do whatever I want, and then I feel like I've been broken down little by little.

Heidi Montag

Heidi Montag: Honey, I'm home.
Spencer Pratt: Oh, my favorite part of the day!