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Have you ever wanted to smell like Ray J's semen? This is your chance!

Because posing in one bikini and being paid to show up at parties makes one an expert in the world of perfume, Kim Kardashian will soon come out with her own fragrance.

The reality TV star will team with Lighthouse Beauty, the same company behind 50 Cent's upcoming men's scent. (Yes, we're sadly serious.)

"Collaborating with Lighthouse Beauty was a really creative, innovative process,” Kardashian said. “What’s so different about their approach is that they have worked so closely with me on all aspects of my fragrance, the bottle, the juice... so I can develop a product that truly represents me and speaks to my fans... the fragrance really captures who I am.”

Interesting. But we're not sure if a product named Talentless Attention-Seeking Sex Tape Star will sell.

  • Bubbly Blonde
  • Life as Kim

Kim Kardashian's upcoming fragrance will really capture who she is. Anyone have a clue what that means?

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Fresh off an appearance on Royal Pains, gorgeous Sports Illustrated model Brooklyn Decker is returning to TV with a guest role on Ugly Betty this fall.

The wife of Andy Rodick will appear as Betty's co-worker Lexie. Decker, 22, sort of confirmed her appearance with this post on her Twitter this week:

“Working on an amazing set!! Can’t tell you guys what it is... Just yet," she Tweeted. "But I can tell you I’m loving it and can’t wait to spill the beans!”

The beans have been spilled. Sorry, B-Deck.

She also appeared on one episode of Chuck last season. Here's hoping for lots more appearances on TV. Or at least more SI Brooklyn Decker pictures.

Hot Brooklyn Decker Pic

Brooklyn Decker is coming to ABC's Ugly Betty this fall.

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Heather Mills may be a renowned digger of gold and an all-around painful individual, but she didn't make terrible points about embattled football star Michael Vick at the Celebrity Catwalk event benefiting National Animal Rescue last night.

At the charity fundraiser in Hollywood, in which the animal lover was honored, she and other stars were asked about Vick and his return to the NFL.

Michael Vick, Eagles

While some stars slammed Vick, Heather Mills was more introspective.

"Everybody deserves a second chance," she told Radar Online. "It's about getting him to turn around a younger generation. In a way, it's the most horrific thing, but if it hadn't have happened there wouldn't be the awareness there is."

Heather Mills looking as glorious as always.

And, while R&B star Mya said "shame on you," to Vick, she also implied that his prison term may have been too severe: "People have done cruel things to other people and have not gotten as much punishment," she said in an interview.

Other stars were more blunt in their disgust for Vick. Girls Next Door star Bridget Marquardt said that she wouldn't give Michael the time of day.

Hills moron Stephanie Pratt didn't hold back: "I hate him. I think he's vile and disgusting." A great line coming from a sibling of Spencer Pratt.

Shannon Elizabeth said Vick "got a free pass" (two years in federal prison apparently qualify) and "better start becoming an animal advocate."

Should Michael Vick receive another chance?

 

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By dating Frederic Thiebaud, Shania Twain has raised eyebrows.

He's the ex-husband, after all, of her friend Marie-Anne Thiebaud - who had been having an affair with Shania’s husband, Robert 'Mutt' Lange. That's drama.

Well, eight months after she began dating the husband of the other woman, it is being reported that Shania Twain and Frederic Thiebaud are getting married!

The couple showed off matching "promise rings" - hers silver with diamonds, his just silver - at Shania’s secluded cottage on the Lake of Bays in Ontario.

They "can’t wait" to make it official.

Shania Twain's husband, Mutt Lange, cheated on her with this dude's wife. Now she's getting the best revenge by getting engaged to Frederic Thiebaud! Supposedly.

A Star Magazine insider (there's a contradiction in terms) says Shania and Frederic have been discussing wedding plans and hope to tie the knot next year.

“[Frederic Thiebaud] is the only person that Shania trusts outside of her family,” says another insider. “She feels so lucky to have found him.”

This story is probably complete crap, but Mutt Lange is still an idiot.

On an unrelated note, Shania turns 44 today. Happy birthday, girl!

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Hey, did you hear that Kourtney Kardashian was pregnant?!?

It's true. She had unprotected sex with shady boyfriend Scott Disick, forgot to take her birth control pill and is now spilling every mind-numbing detail of her expecting state.

While Kourtney has (miraculously) not spoken out about the impending child today, she was spotted walking down the street, her baby bump in full effect.

Due to deliver in December, Kardashian can be seen every week on the painfully scripted reality series Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami. We'd rather listen to Kourtney talk about her pregnancy than watch that nonsense.

  • Baby Bumped
  • Very Preggers
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Lindsay Lohan wants a change of address.

No, really, she's moving. Apparently her current house being broken into twice and constantly surrounded by paparazzi lessened the appeal a bit.

At the same time, Samantha Ronson happens to be moving, sick of constant celebrity gossip photographer presence outside her L.A. residence.

Could they be moving to a new place together?

Not likely. But they both are after more privacy and security. Lohan has movers coming today to transport all her stuff from her rented Hollywood Hills home to a more secure high-rise, which she planned even before her recent burglary.

Early on August 23, Lindsay Lohan came home to find a door off its hinges and a safe ripped out of the wall. The police are still trying to identify three suspects who were caught on tape by surveillance cameras ransacking the property.

Lindsay and Sam Picture

Both halves of this troubled, quasi-lesbian couple are seeking new pads.

"I'm sorry i haven't been on in a bit," she Twittered on Wednesday. "My life has been kind of in shambles considering my house was broken into. i feel violated."

She's been violated quite a lot in recent years.

As for Samantha Ronson, she hasn't been robbed, but having to face a bunch of flashbulbs whenever she walks outside hasn't been particularly fun for her.

So she's moving out of her rented Hollywood Hills abode, which currently has a "for lease" sign hanging out front, and is headed for ... an L.A. high-rise!

Hmm ...

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Dr. Arnold Klein realizes there is a "strong possibility" he is the father of Michael Jackson's two oldest children, Prince Michael, 12 and Paris Jackson, 11.

His lawyer, Mark Vincent Kaplan, admitted this on the record.

"There was a strong possibility that the two older kids could be biologically linked to Dr. Klein. And Dr. Klein was well aware," Kaplan told Us Weekly.

The attorney was explaining why he and Klein went to the guardianship hearing for Jackson's children, who are living with Michael's mom Katherine.

Us Weekly first reported that Dr. Arnold Klein - Jackson's dermatologist - is Prince and Paris' biological father. Debbie Rowe, who worked for Klein for 23 years, is the biological mother, and was wed to Jackson for three years.

In his only public comments on the subject, Klein said that "to the best of his knowledge" he is not their father. But he did admit donating sperm to MJ.

Michael was also father to Blanket, 7, born to a different mother.

We may never know for sure, but there is a strong likelihood that the biological father of Michael Jackson's two eldest children is Dr. Arnold Klein, his lawyer says.

"Dr. Klein wanted to assert a request that he had concerns," said Kaplan (above, right). "He had an agreement with Michael Jackson that if anything happened to Michael, Dr. Klein would do what he could to see that they were protected."

Still, Arnold Klein does not want to challenge the Katherine Jackson's guardianship of the kids, and won't submit to a DNA test, according to Kaplan.

"It would serve no helpful purpose for the children to be distracted from believing Michael Jackson is not the father in every possibility," he said.

"It is not something Dr. Klein feels he is interested to establish. It is not going to help the children," he says, "other than to solve the answered question, which is a selfish motive to see who the ultimate provider of the 13 chromosomes [is]."

"Katherine Jackson is responsible for the decisions and upbringing of the children," Kaplan says. "His concerns were the influence of people around her."

Kaplan did not name names, but is obviously talking about Joe Jackson, Michael's supremely shady and abusive father (who lives apart from Katherine).

Another longtime friend, Mark Lester, also came forward to admit he gave Jackson sperm in the '90s that he thinks may have been used to create Paris.

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Brody Jenner and his girlfriend, Playboy Playmate of the Year 2008 Jayde Nicole, apparently got into an epic fight outside of Guys and Dolls this morning.

Not with each other. It was both of them against the slimy Joe Francis.

Here's how it went down, according to Brody: he and Jayde were at the club celebrating his birthday when Jayde saw Joe hitting on an ex, "unrelentingly."

An ex-girlfriend of Francis', that is, but one Jayde Nicole and Brody know, and felt Joe was harassing. Jayde then stepped in and threw a drink on Francis.

Francis responded by pulling Jayde's hair, smacking her in the face and shoving her to the ground, where he proceeded to kick her. What an a$$hole!

Security broke it up and Francis was dragged off, but Brody was irate. He started yelling at Francis and trying to get at him until both men were ejected.

We can only cross our fingers that The Hills was being filmed at the time.

Joseph Francis Pic

Joe Francis allegedly beat up Jayde Nicole at a club early this morning.

Outside the club, Brody tried to get back in to check on Jayde but security wouldn't let him. Jenner then saw and got a clear shot at Joe Francis, punching him in the face. Someone then tasered Brody and he collapsed to the ground.

Francis left the scene, where the cops came, but no one was arrested.

Jayde Nicole, who has a black and blue cheek, a swollen face, a bruised left rib and a sore lower abdomen, says she will press charges against Francis.

Brody Jenner took to (what else) Twitter to speak out this morning: "Joe Francis beat up my lady for no reason! Pulled her to the ground, punched & kicked her. what does that say about him. you call yourself a man when you beat up a girl??"

"Joe Francis is a piece of sh!t. Joe Francis needs to be in jail!!!"

No arguments here. Hey, he was there once before.

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Rebecca Gayheart and Eric Dane were spotted laughing and smiling throughout a romantic stay at the San Ysidro Ranch in Montecito, Calif., last weekend.

Why so jovial after the release of the scandalous Eric Dane tape?

Because they are laid-back people who just don't care, and the naked tape wasn't even all that embarrassing really may be expecting a little McSteamy!

"Having a baby has been a top priority of the past six months," reveals an insider, who says the pair has had trouble conceiving since they eloped in 2004.

Life & Style says Rebecca is 3-4 months pregnant right now. While we don't believe that necessarily at all, the couple has talked about having kids a lot.

  • Gayheart Picture
  • Eric Dane Topless

It takes more than a naked tape to faze these free spirits.

Gayheart turned down the role of Penn Badgley and Taylor Momsen's mom on Gossip Girl because it was based in New York City and she didn't want to be away from Eric or travel that far, according to a source close to the couple.

"It was bad for her health," the insider says. "She's also turned down a Hallmark movie and a Lifetime movie because she was trying to have a baby."

We just hope they don't name it Kari Ann. As for the Grey's Anatomy hunk? You can see him on Season 6 of that program starting September 24.

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Despite exciting rumors that Adam Lambert would be featured on the New Moon soundtrack, we can now confirm that this won't be the case.

But dry those tears, fans: the film has found a suitable replace for the movie's first single.

The Death Cab for Cutie song “Meet Me On the Equinox” will debut on September 13 at the MTV Music Awards. It was written specifically for New Moon and chosen as the featured tune over recordings by Thom Yorke, Bon Iver and Muse, all of whom will appear on the album.

Said Death Cab for Cutie bassist Nick Harmer:

"We didn't expect it would be chosen for the first single — we were thinking it would be a part of the soundtrack, maybe... It's been an exciting process, because we've been so removed from it. We were in L.A. for a week and we went into the studio and wrote and recorded the song and submitted it. We didn't know where anything stood, and then we just got a call last week."

The New Moon soundtrack is now available for pre-order for at Amazon.com for $9.99. It will be released on October 20.

In other Twilight Saga news: check out the first official pics of the Volturi! Dakota Fanning has never looked so scary.

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