The Hills Recap: "Playmates Bring the Drama"

On last night's episode of The Hills, the crew returned from vacation and the aftershocks from Brody and Audrina’s Hawaiian hookup were felt throughout SoCal.

In short, Jayde Nicole went ballistic, and may be slightly insane.

Lauren Conrad warned Audrina Patridge early on that Brody Jenner admitted his mistake to his girlfriend, and that a jealous Jayde was far from pleased.

When Jayde found out Audrina was en route to Frankie's Delgado's barbecue, she grew pissed and her Playmate friends started talk of a girl fight.

Brody told her to relax and apologized again, and Frankie tried to cover for him, saying they just fell asleep, but Jayde wasn't buying it - and Audrina's apparent blowing of a kiss in Brody's direction just made things worse.

That led to the first of two Jayde Nicole-Audrina Patridge showdowns.

Audrina claimed she “would never go there” and they just "stayed up talking" that night. But Jayde snapped, “If you sleep in my boyfriend’s bed, something happened,” and proceeded to pound Jägermeister straight from the bottle.

The following night, things got even worse when Stephanie and Audrina hit up the hot club MyHouse even though they knew Jayde would be there with Brody.

Brody told his drunk girlfriend he wouldn’t tell Audrina to leave because they’re friends. “Not anymore,” replied the jealous, slurring Jayde Nicole. Oh, snap.

The Playboy bunny then told her posse of girlfriends - “playmates who bring the drama” - that Brody was just asking for them to get riled up. They obliged.

Jayde's pal Jo got all up in Audrina’s grill. Frankie tried to step in, but Jayde was fuming, calling her names, downing more Jäger and threatening to punch her.

Audrina eventually took a hint and left.

Over brunch the next day, Lauren urged Brody to apologize to Audrina, but he was unwilling. He blamed her for not leaving his room and said he cared more - without a doubt - about where he stood with Jayde than his longtime friend.

LC lamented sacrificing friends for the ones we love.

Meanwhile, in Speidi Land ...

Heidi Montag intercepted a text from Stacie asking Spencer Pratt to meet her at H. Wood, and decided to delete the text, then see if he showed up.

Always better than direct confrontation, right? Right. So off she went, dragging sister and sister-in-law, Holly Montag and Stephanie Pratt, on a stakeout.

Stacie showed up and waved before slipping into the booth for another girl fight. Stacie was quick to assume the same “I’m the single one” stance as Audrina.

Heidi asked her to stop coming after Spencer, saying, “I wish this upon you. One day, I hope you know how it feels to have a conniving girl come into your life.”

Stacie replied that there will always be another Stacie, and that Spencer is the one she should be worrying about, because he's the one in a relationship.

Later, Spencer and Heidi returned to therapy.

Heidi admitted to going through Spencer’s phone, and he accused her of not trusting him. After more passive-aggressive bickering going back-and-forth, the therapist looked exasperated as she could barely get a word in edgewise.

We can't imagine why.

Spencer Pratt later came back for a solo visit and seemed somewhat contrite. He and the therapist came up with a plan for him to “not go out.” That way, if his relationship crashes and burns, he will at least know that he gave it his best.

Since we already know about the Speidi wedding, this plot line is sort of pointless, but his snarky remarks in the sessions almost make it worth it anyway.

Click to enlarge more photos of Brody's girlfriend Jayde, who was actually the Playmate of the Year in 2008 (she was just replaced by Ida Ljungqvist):