We're really sorry, Dina Lohan.
For years, we've labeled you as the Worst Mother in the World. But you may need to pimp out your daughters and toot your own supposedly hard-working horn a lot louder in order to overtake Linda Hogan now.
Last week, daughter Brooke Hogan accused her mother of doing drugs, while also taking her to task yet again for dating 19-year old Charlie Hill.
In response, Linda (hiding behind representative Gary Smith) has written a statement to Perez Hilton in which she accuses her own child of:
- Having fake breasts;
- "Banging the crap" out of boyfriend Stack$ for three years;
- And scarcely selling any albums.
Linda also says ex-husband Hulk Hogan is "no different" from OJ Simpson and that young Charlie is really good at diving into a swimming pool.
Linda Hogan has set the awful mothering bar incredibly high. Will anyone be able to raise it?
You've gotta read this hilarious, rambling, grammatically-reprehensible statement to believe it:
If Brooke continues to spew lies on behalf of her father's lame attempt to distance himself from the reality that he is no different from the homicidal OJ Simpson, Charlie will be forced to put aside his paramedic/firefighting career path and release an album called "Redemption" which will easily surpass any of Brooke's records sales.
If it is her claim that her breasts are natural or she hasn't been banging the crap out of the pot head $tack for the last 3 years, then her comments of Charlie being a year and a half younger than her are again a complete fabrication (they are 4 months apart).
Here are some cold hard facts; these people who say Linda is doing drugs are friends of Hulk Hogan... Linda will walk into any drug testing facility and take a random test and the truth will be she is clean.
Brooke "thinks" she's doing drugs is a hypocrisy when her father and $tack are rolling and Smoking joints together in Brooke's recording session, and Brooke knows it.
As for Charlie, he is an accomplished Spring board diver (4th in the Nationals), eagle scout and certified captain in commercial boating with his bigger goal of joining the fire department. Linda's definition of a good time is hitting a 8:30 am mass at St Max's grabbing some Cuban food at Versailles (her fav).
You can choose your favorite part of this ridiculous, public slamming of Linda's own daughter.
But we love the fact that it's signed by: "Gary Smith on behalf of Linda Hogan, Global PR Inc."
If it actually exists, how awful of a public relations firm is Global PR Inc?!? This is the most comprehensible statement it could write?
Share
7 Comments
June 12th, 2009 12:39 AM
I THINK ITS A SHAME THAT A MOTHER WOULD TALK ABOUT HER DAUGHTER LIKE THAT. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT LINDA IS COVERED IN FILTH AND HER ATTORNY SHOULD NOT LET HER MAKE ANY STATEMENTS. I guess she is More OJ like then Hulk.
July 28th, 2009 4:17 PM
i cant believe taht Linda would say those things about Brooke. What kind of mother is she? A mother is suppose to care and love their children but she is just smashing Brooke. And for her dating a 19 year old, that is just ridiculous. why doesnt she just date someone her own age!!!
August 27th, 2009 11:29 AM
Linda hogan is a heartless skank...she is a cold hearted UGLY person. Her face is absolutely hideous!!!
She would have nothing if it was for Terry...How dare she take him for everything he has or has worked for. HE DID THE WORK....all she did was sit on her fat a$$ and apply makeup all day...she never did a damn thing to earn money. How dare that judge grant her so much and leave him with nothing. I am a mother and i'm sorry but when i left my ex all i did was make sure that he helped with paying the rent...not went after EVRY single dime and then on top of it she wants him locked up if she doesn't get HIS harley...WOW...and it's sad casue that poor man is gonna have to give it up just so that dirt bag can give it to her husband...If her boyfriend was a real man he would say "nope, i dont want his stuff, i will get my own bike"...I guess his dirt bike has a flat!!! GOD I HATE HER!!!
August 27th, 2009 11:32 AM
Oh i forgot to mention...if she was my mom...I would have nothing to do with her either....she looks like that crazy face woman who played in Cry Baby with Johnny Depp.
August 27th, 2009 12:10 PM
linda hogan hhhmm what can i say but you suck as a moms and hulk hogan should body slam you and u lil boy toy that would be funny.
September 20th, 2009 5:35 AM
Look Linda u are a backstabing two face Bitch and no botox can stop u from turning into a hag
October 21st, 2009 9:42 PM
I think this is all stupid. But I'm 24 and would band the hell out of Linda.