And now it's time for our Nolan Gerard Funk penis update of the day.
While Nickeloden is hoping this young star helps the network's upcoming High School Musical rip-off, Spectacular!, go-go to the top of the ratings chart, a new report indicates that Funk has a different sort of go-go history.
According to Perez Hilton, the 22-year-old Canadian actor worked as a go-go dancer at a gay club in Los Angeles in 2006.
"Nolan went by the name of JT," said Hilton's supposedly well-placed source. "He has a giant uncut cock!"
The insider added that Funk insisted he was straight throughout his employment at the establishment. We're not judging either way.
But if Funk really is the nezt Zac Efron, he might wanna find his own Vanessa Hudgens in order to ward off rumors. We hear Khloe Kardashian is single.