Jessica Simpson: Future College Student

Despite possessing an IQ only slightly higher than that of an eggplant, the great Jessica Simpson says she wants to attend college to study theology.

Watching TV was her inspiration, natch.

"I've been contemplating taking a college course in religion," the aunt of Bronx Mowgli Wentz said in a recent interview with Marie Claire.

We do have to admire Jess' enthusiasm for learning. Guess she's thinking that she won't always be able to depend on these to get her by ...

If she ever does enroll in some sort of college, Jessica Simpson should definitely wear outfits like these to classes. That's how you get an A+, girl. It's foolproof.

"I love religion. I remember when The Da Vinci Code came out, the Discovery Channel did this three-night piece on it that I TiVoed and then watched eight times."

Mmm. Jessica Simpson should definitely include that anecdote in her application letters when she applies to local institutions of higher education.