As usual, THG's recap of The Hills will consist of us grading last night's episode, awarding or deducting points for the best and worst moments.
Scandalously, Holly Montag moved in with Lauren Conrad and Lo Bosworth, resulting in some choice remarks from Team Speidi. Whitney kept in touch with Jay, and Audrina (for the 394th straight week) pondered her future with Justin-Bobby.
On to the rankings! Chime in with your own!
Holly Montag moving in with Lauren Conrad when there are 10 trillion sublet options in L.A. seems absurdly fake, but Minus only 2 because it's not that big a stretch to believe LC would extend Holly the offer to passive-aggressively stick it to Heidi.
In Venice, Justin-Bobby philosophizes that there is something "Zen-ful" about the beach. Holy hell, this guy must smoke SO much weed. Plus 9.
Spencer leaves to "go enjoy life." Minus 3, because we all know he only enjoys life when wreaking havoc on The Hills or staging photo shoots.
No Brody Jenner again. This is disappointing to us, because we have a slight crush on Brody, but then again the man has been traveling with Jayde Nicole. We wouldn't be on The Hills either if that were the alternative. Plus 3.
Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge laugh about how they "attract trouble" when they go out. Minus 5, because it's not that noteworthy - they get paid to, and a decent amount of said trouble is manufactured or at least embellished by MTV.
Casey Patridge calls out Justin-Bobby for his crap and Audrina for her excuses. Plus 3 for Casey's honesty, but Minus 5 because Audrina obviously doesn't listen, and Minus another 1 for Casey's tats. A little too much tramp stampage for us.
LC says of Spencer, "He drives away everyone that cares about her." Yes. Yes he does. So astute on her part, and so entertaining on his. Plus 4.
Sam Nazarian simply "doesn't get" the Spencer thing. He's not alone. Plus 2.
Spencer Pratt is happy Heidi will be back at work and not "moping around" at home anymore. Plus 3, because he wants that lifestyle all to himself.
Justin-Bobby gives Audrina a t-shirt as a present, then adds, "No bras with that thing, thank you." Wow. Minus 7, because not only is J-Bobby the biggest d!ck ever, but with those fake boobs, Audzo doesn't need bras for ANY outfit!
Plus 10 for the whole "stalker mom" exchange. Follow the link to peep the video of this segment if you missed, it's vintage Speidi.
TOTAL: +11. Pretty entertaining all around. Leave a comment with your own!