Leave it to the UK's News of the World - also known as the super-trustworthy English equivalent of In Touch Weekly - to make up dig up probably the funniest batch of lies gossip yet about America's sweetheart pregnant teen Bristol Palin.
According to the publication, Levi Johnston, Bristol Palin's baby-daddy, was in a three-year relationship with her best friend, Lanesia Garcia, when he and Bristol - Republican V.P. candidate Sarah Palin's daughter - started hooking up.
Bristol then started pressuring Lanesia to break up with Levi Johnston when rumors started flying that he was cheating on her with other girls.
Lanesia Garcia said she was devastated to find out through another friend that Bristol Palin - her friend since the age of six - was one of them:
"I didn't believe it, I never dreamt she was capable of doing that to me. But when I called her she just said, 'I'm so sorry, I couldn't help it. Levi and I are together now and I think he's the man for me.' I put the phone down and have not talked to her since. I was distraught for a year - I missed Bristol desperately but also Sarah, who was like a second mom to me. Neither of them have tried to contact me, though - which says something about how ruthless they can be. The phrase Sarah used comparing herself to a lipstick-wearing pit bull is spot on."
Yeah, Lanesia Garcia totally produced this quote. Lies. All of it. Doesn't make it any less funny or entertaining, but come on, News of the World.
At least try to make it semi-believable next time?