The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest 44

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Welcome, celebrity news and gossip fans everywhere, to The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest, our site's fun, Friday afternoon tradition.

This week's Caption Contest winner is Kristi. Nice effort! Scroll down to see the winning entry and the full list of submitted captions.

Thanks for playing and good luck again next week!

"When I grow up, I wanna be a sailor with an ass like an anchor...be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it."

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I'm not wearing any underwear.

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"...and then after showing him my coconuts, Gilligan voted me off the Island *sob*"

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I would like to buy a vowel...oh wait, I'm not on Wheel of Fortune?? That's why I bought the outfit

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Still wondering why I am famous

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Let me tell you a story about how an ass got so big, people had to redo the short shorts just so it would fit.

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"And this is my outfit for pretending people actually care about me!"

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"When I grow up, I wanna be a sailor with an ass like an anchor...be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it."

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...and then you position the camera at just the right angle where you get maximum booty jiggle shots. Next, you leak word of it to the tabloids, file a phony injunction to stop it from being distributed, then make a back alley deal with the distributor and voila! You're rich and famous! Any questions?

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Kim Kardashian is about to do her portral of Sharon Stone's scene from "Basic Instinct"

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Kim Kardashian tries as best she can not to deep throat the microphone.