Tale of the Tape: Carrie Underwood vs. Jessica Simpson

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The Hollywood Gossip staff is proud to bring you Tale of the Tape, a feature in which we break down prospective matchups within the celebrity world. The following one that has been brewing for awhile - and is getting more heated by the day.

Carrie Underwood, our current Caption Contest subject, used to date Tony Romo, who is now dating Jessica Simpson. But he may still be pining for Carrie, and Jessica is jealous, and apparently talkin' smack about Carrie (see photo below)!

It's so on. Which of these women of Tony Romo will emerge victorious after a grueling, 10-round fight? Let's find out. Ding, ding!

Jessica Simpson takes a thinly-veiled shot at Carrie Underwood's vegetarianism.

1. ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE OTHER

Carrie Underwood: Not acknowledging the bitch
Jessica Simpson: Passive-aggressive t-shirts
Edge: Carrie

2. TALENT

Carrie Underwood: Loads
Jessica Simpson: N/A
Edge: Carrie

3. GRAMMY AWARDS

Carrie Underwood: 3
Jessica Simpson: N/A
Edge: Carrie

4. INSANE FATHERS

Carrie Underwood: N/A
Jessica Simpson: Joe Simpson
Edge: Carrie

5. SPORTS EXPERIENCE

Carrie Underwood: Solid charity softball player
Jessica Simpson: Bad luck Dallas Cowboys cheerleader
Edge: Carrie

6. POSSESSES FAKE ...

Carrie Underwood: Disdain for Simon Cowell
Jessica Simpson: Chin, Nose, Sincerity
Edge: Carrie

7. INTELLECTUAL ACHIEVEMENTS

Carrie Underwood: High school salutatorian; Graduated magna cum laude from Northeastern State University (Okla.), Class of 2006!
Jessica Simpson: Thought tuna was chicken
Edge: Carrie

8. MOST APPROPRIATE SONG TITLE

Carrie Underwood: "All-American Girl"
Jessica Simpson: "Push Your Tush"
Edge: Carrie

9. REALITY TV HIGHLIGHTS

Carrie Underwood: Winning American Idol
Jessica Simpson: Lots of dumb quotes on Newlyweds
Edge: Carrie

10. MOST LIKELY FUTURE

Carrie Underwood: Country Music Hall of Fame
Jessica Simpson: Soft-core porn
Edge: Carrie

THE VERDICT: The real country singer takes it - and for the first time in The Hollywood Gossip history, it's by a perfect, 10-0 score. By virtue of being blanked, Jessica must do a naked run. We're waiting, airhead.

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Jessica Simpson Biography

Not a Major Movie Star By Any Means
Sweet mother of G-d, Jessica Simpson has got some huge breasts. Holy frickin' $h!t. Look at those things! She also possesses a singing... More »
Born
Birthplace
Abilene, Texas
Full Name
Jessica Ann Simpson

Jessica Simpson Quotes

They're just the cutest couple in the world. They are adorable. Anybody would wish to be them and you can only wish them well. Just being around them inspires love and everything I sing about.

Jessica Simpson [on her sister and Pete Wentz]

It’s fun to do a small film that might be released to DVD not because it’s a horrible film, but because it’s an independent film. For people to say Employee of the Month was a flop is ludicrous. We made the money back–that’s not a flop. For people to say The Dukes of Hazzard was a flop–it opened to $30 million! If these movies are flops, why would I still make them?

Jessica Simpson