What's more unlikely than the recently released Kristin Davis nude photos being legitimate?
Heather Mills possessing any sort of qualification necessary to judge a beauty pageant.
Nevertheless, the spoiled, useless, gold-digging peg leg of an ex-wife to Paul McCartney has been booked as a judge for The Miss USA Pageant.
Heather Mills stares into the distance, wondering how she'll ever subsist on just $50 million.
Annoying Brother-sister duo Donny and Marie Osmond will be hosting the beauty pageant, which will air from Planet Hollywood in Las Vegas, Nevada on Friday, April 11.
Yesterday, Mills was awarded about $50 million in her divorce settlement with McCartney - and then doused his lawyer with water after the verdict was revealed.