Mary Jo Eustace Offers Advice to Heather Mills

We assume Heather Mills only listens to the voices in her head.

But let's hope the one-legged former call girl and Mrs. Paul McCartney at least heeds the advice of Mary Jo Eustace.

As the scorned ex-wife of Dean McDermott, who left her for Tori Spelling, Mary Jo Eustace speaks from experience when she offers advice to Mills.

"First rule of combat, Heather - if I can call you Heather - is to never, ever, let them see you sweat," Mary Jo recently said, in reference to Mills' public breakdown on British television.

"I really think it is time to stop trying so hard, because frankly even going on Dancing with the Stars again will not salvage this mess. Please listen carefully - no more TV interviews, or scrapbooking, or threatening to take a Beatle down, or saying you thought of suicide when you probably didn't, or asking for water at room temperature when nobody really know what that temperature is.

Now is the time to forget about the court of public opinion, because let's face it, even when you win that, what does it all mean in the end?"

Wow. Eustace sounds just like newswoman Melissa Theuriau, telling it like it is.

"A family has broken up," she continued. "There is a child involved and you will have to deal with that Sir Paul McCartney whether you like it or not. And for God's sake, look at the positives - financially, you will never have to worry about your daughter's well-being or your own.

As a matter of fact, you can probably enjoy a lovely quality of life and become anonymously involved with all the charities you so lovingly speak about. I can consider all of this a gift. Take it."

Amen, Mary Jo. We hope these words of wisdom prove to eligible bachelors out there that you're more of a catch than Mills and Spelling combined.

Hear that, Justin Brescia?