Stupid celebrity gossip photographers.
These money-driven loons have forced Kate Middleton to pull out of a charity fundraising race to France due to "safety" concerns.
"Kate has chosen to drop out, having taken advice," boat captain Emma Sayle told People magazine. "It's a safety thing ... security issues."
The girlfriend of Prince William was set to steer an all-female crew in a traditional Chinese dragon boat across the 21-mile English Channel. They were to vie against an all-male crew in an record-breaking attempt scheduled for August 25.
"She's upset she can't do it, but she's made a call and taken the whole team into consideration. By pulling out she's doing it for everyone else," said Sayle, adding that maybe Prince Harry's girlfriend, Chelsy Davy, has more of a sack than Middleton.
Just kidding about that last part.
During their training sessions on the River Thames in the west of London, the women's crew had found themselves under the glare of
stalkers celebrity news journalists, which Sayle referred to as a "nightmare." She can only imagine what it's like to be in the spotlight all the time, like poor Spencer Pratt.
Earlier this year Middleton's lawyers issued a warning to photographers asking that they respect her privacy.
The crew rep says it is now too late to find a new recruit. But we hear Kim Kardashian has a good track record with seamen.