Pete Wentz, Ashlee Simpson So Not Engaged

Contrary to online reports swirling on the Internets, sources close to Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz say they are not engaged. Phew.

That saves us the trouble of having to create a celebrity couple name in the vein of Kurban or Spederline or TomKat or Gyllenhaarsgaard.

A representative for Ashlee Simpson tells Us Weekly that the engagement rumors are "absolutely not true."

A celebrity news site called Popcrunch claimed that Wentz, 28, proposed to Simpson, 22, on July 7 before Fall Out Boy's performance at Live Earth.

Further, they speculate that the engagement stems from news that Ashlee Simpson is totally pulling a Nicole Richie: she's a worthless waif pregnant.

The site's sources say that the rumored engagement has been kept secret because Simpson fears overexposure - which plagued Nick Lachey and older sister Jessica Simpson.

If that were true, who could blame Ashlee? Older sis' career has gone nowhere but down since the divorce, while a resurgent Nick Lachey is actually making hit songs (and sex tapes) while seeing that fox Vanessa Minnillo nude every night.

Yes, while we commend the plastic surgery victim's alleged thinking should Wentz ever pop the question, the reason for the "secrecy" looks like simple nonexistence.

So, that's that. You may now return to debating whether or not the Paris Hilton nipple slip we saw Monday is worse than Britney Spears' recent efforts.