The Hollywood Gossip - and everyone else - expected nothing less from a whiny brat like Paris Hilton.
Reports that Nicole Richie is using pregnancy rumors to keep her own skinny ass out of the slammer didn't surprise our celebrity gossip staff either.
But when a weeping Tom Sizemore appeared in a Los Angeles County Courtroom yesterday - admitted to violating his probation in a 2004 methamphetamine conviction - the bar was lowered further.
Tom Sizemore was brought into the courtroom in a jail-issued orange jumpsuit, wearing handcuffs, where he waited for a judge to hear the case.
The judge asked Sizemore, "Do you agree you are in violation of your probation?"
Tom replied, "Yes, your honor."
The judge made her findings clear, telling the Black Hawk Down star "Probation is a privilege ... Tom is not a matter of probation anymore because he has abused that privilege."
Tom Sizemore openly cried in court, flat-out begging the judge:
"I don't want to go to jail ... give me just one more chance ... I have a terrible disease ... drugs have strapped me around the neck ... I guarantee I am not going to be here again! I want to rehabilitate myself and become a good productive citizen to society."
Wow, what a display. When Britney Spears is inevitably arrested for DUI and Social Services tries to take her kids away, we expect this kind of courtroom shenanigans.
Tom Sizemore's brother, Paul, and his girlfriend were present in court for the hearing, where the troubled actor faced felony charges.
Sizemore was arrested last month in Bakersfield on suspicion of various drug charges, including methamphetamine possession.
Tom could face up to 16 months for violating his probation. He is due back in court Monday, June 25 to officially hear his fate.
We're not concerned about whether Tom winds up in the slammer, to be perfectly honest with you. But if he does, we hope Scott Stapp lands there, too, that d!ck.