Janice Dickinson is ugly and insane.
This is far from newsworthy. It's like reporting that Paula Abdul enjoys pain medication.
But the fact that Dickinson recently admitted to playing a role in her abusive father's death? Okay, now you have our attention.
'When my father was having a heart attack, I threw his heart pills out of the ambulance window," the crazy model told Reveal magazine in an interview. "I killed him, but I have no regrets. It doesn't feel good, but I'd do it all over again."
Strong words. We wonder if they'll lead to Janice joining Paris Hilton in prison.
If so, she'll miss out on having lots of sex with famous people. Dickinson claims she's had over 1,000 lovers, among them Jack Nicholson and Warren Beatty, each of whom thought they were the best.
"They all think they're so special but I was like: "You're not unique, I'm going to go and date the other Academy Award winner!" Dickinson proudly said. "My mantelpiece used to be lined with Academy Awards I nicked from the stars I'd slept with; I gave them back eventually.'
Somewhere - rehab, probably - Lindsay Lohan is getting pissed that someone else is acting sluttier than she is.
Meanwhile, despite the fact that she has intercourse with boyfriend Joe Caplin "until the cows come home," Janice says there's a famous Brit she'd like to shag:
"I'd f**k Simon Cowell in a heartbeat. And I think his girlfriend's pretty cute - I'd f**k her, too."
It's nice to see this woman isn't at all desperate for attention, isn't it? Especially as she ends the interview by talking about Pete Doherty's penis for some reason. Kate Moss might wanna watch out.
"I wouldn't judge Pete Doherty by his looks, he might have a 12 foot penis!' Dickinson said without any prompting at all.