Bleach Blonde Photo Finish: Joslyn Noel Morse vs. Marey Carey vs. Pamela Anderson vs. Holly Madison

Apparently, Alex Rodriguez likes his stripper mistresses bleach blonde. And kinda masculine. And not particularly attractive, considering he's not only a reasonably handsome fella, but a superstar baseball player with a $252 million contract.

Yes, since the "Stray-Rod" scandal broke and it became known that Alex Rodriguez has been hitting strip clubs and likely having an affair with dancer Joslyn Noel Morse, The Hollywood Gossip has been trying to determine who the Iowa native reminds us of.

Then we were sent pictures of Joslyn Noel Morse nude. That didn't help us much either. But we can tell you one thing - despite her ample chest, she doesn't "stack" up to some of our celebrity gossip staff members' favorite bleach-blonde hotties.

None of whom are really our type. But if you're going to keep hitting strip clubs and cheating on your smart, pretty wife, might as well up your standards, Alex.

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Up top, we see Joslyn Morse and porn star Marey Carey. On the bottom row, the legendary Pamela Anderson and Hugh Hefner's #1 girlfriend, Holly Madison. Also naked.

Joslyn Morse, described by the New York Post as a "Playboy bunny wannabe," is in pretty exclusive company here. We can't say if she'll ever grace the pages of Hugh's magazine, but hey, if she changes her name to one resembling a famous person, a la Marey Carey or Katee Holmes, she might have a shot at porn.

Alexis Rodriguez, here we come.