Keira Knightley Wins Suit Against Tabloid; Still Skinny

Actress Keira Knightley has accepted a 3,000-pound (6,000 dollar, 4,460 euro) settlement of her libel claim against London's Daily Mail over a story suggesting she was responsible for the death of an anorexic teen.

Much as we love making skinny jokes and constant cracks about Keira Knightley's weight, or lack thereof (snap!) we have to admit that's a ridiculous claim.

It would be like blaming Lily Allen every time some girl gives blow jobs on a school playground or holding Lindsay Lohan responsible for every DUI in Southern California.

Keira Knightley also said the story "falsely suggested" that she suffered from eating disorders.

We're just going to take a pass on that one.

Kate Wilson, representing Associated Newspapers, the publisher of the Daily Mail, told a court Thursday that Knightley was not responsible for a death, and that Knightley "does not have an eating disorder, and has not misled the public."

In January, the Daily Mail published a Keira Knightley photo of her in a bikini with the headline: "If pictures like this one of Keira carried a health warning, my darling daughter might have lived."

Knightley's lawyer, Simon Smith, said the article could be interpreted to say that she was personally responsible for the death of Sophie Mazurek, 19, who had suffered from anorexia.

The Love Actually and comic porn star, who was not present in court, intends to donate the settlement to Beat, an eating disorder and mental illness charity.

Then, she and Rupert Friend plan on being photographed somewhere in London looking frightening and gaunt.