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They really have no idea how to celebrate a celebrity wedding in India. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes need to get on the phone, ASAP.

After all, two of India’s hottest movie stars, Aishwarya Rai and Abhishek Bachchan, have secretly sent invitations to their private wedding this month. a newspaper reported Thursday, not even alerting Hollywood gossip rags, such as this one, about who’s invited.

The nerve!

For weeks, the Indian media has been reporting that the Bollywood couple will wed in a small private ceremony on April 20 at Bachchan’s family home in suburban Mumbai. But the couple, sadly, won’t be following the lead of Elizabeth Hurley and Arun Nayar – no multi-marriage, spotlight-grabbing nuptials for this pair.

And why is that unfortunate? Well, have you ever seen an Aishwarya Rai photo? The more we can get this beauty in the news, the better.

For now, we’ll have to hope that Salma Hayek and François-Henri Pinault have the sort of lavish Hollywood ceremony we’re used to in the States. That’ll show Aishwarya how it’s done!