As Jennifer Armstrong of Entertainment Weekly notes, it was almost as if we were watching the wrong show Monday night, what with all the signs of sense popping up around our girls on The Hills:
"I feel like Jason like broke me," Lauren said, explaining for the 48th time that she's reeling from the breakup with Jason Wahler and not "feeling" Brody. Yet
Then Heidi said she thought it was about time she make amends with one-time BFF and current rival Audrina Patridge, scoffing,
"What are we, in high school?"
Apparently her obnoxious beau (and the cause of the Audrina rift), Spencer, still is. He showed his true colors last week, and this episode is no different.
Like when Heidi Montag's co-worker, Max, warned her that she might be criticized for the adorable, yet skimpy white sundress she wore to the office.
Spencer, like, totally got in the dude's face when they showed up for lunch at the same restaurant (another strange Hills coincidence).
"Do you have any idea what I'm gonna do to you, bro?" Spencer said, nearly running poor Max into oncoming traffic. This after a lunch full of Spencer doing preemptive damage control on the impending Heidi-Audrina summit, warning Heidi that she's gotta think about her motives.
Translation: Don't believe Audrina when she tells the truth about Spencer macking on her when he was with Heidi. The light (slowly) started to dawn on Heidi by the time she got through her dinner with Audrina.
"I'm really sick of people saying to me, 'Watch out for Spencer, watch out for Spencer,'" she said. But then Audrina told her Spencer had been calling her in the last few weeks, and when she said, "Be careful with him," Heidi seemed to actually be giving it some thought.
"I don't know when I got so jealous," Heidi said as she packed for a trip home to Colorado. This was right after a not-so-subtle request that Lauren Conrad do a little bit of spying on Spencer in her spare time that weekend.
Then, our girl Heidi accidentally - riiiiight - missed her flight and forgot to tell Spencer about it! Naturally, she showed up unannounced at the club, where Spencer was engaged in an intense conversation about naked picnics (really) with three blonde Playboy models he and Brody Jenner were rolling with that night.
Brody, ever the smooth operator, went immediately to Lauren, hugged her, and said: "You didn't crash anybody's night. If anything, you just made my night."
Spencer, on the other hand, accused Heidi of being sneaky, asked her why she was being rude, and proceeded to resume his naked picnic discussion.
Finally, Heidi had enough, which means she ended up sprawled on the sofa back home, in sweats and puffy eyed, while Lauren did some first-rate BFF duty.
"I was really falling in love with him," Heidi bemoaned.
As long as Heidi's around, there will never be too much good judgment on this show. But does this mean she and Spencer are officially over? We'll probably find out next week on The Hills... and we'll definitely be watching again then.