Kelly Slater is a surfing champion.
Alas, he claims he is not the champion of Cameron Diaz.
In other, non-lame segue words: they have not been dating. Despite the time these beautiful people have been spending together, don't read too much into the relationship.
"We're just friends," Slater told People magazine last week at the Pebble Beach National Pro-Am Tournament, adding that he and Diaz met "a few years ago" when he appeared on her MTV show, Trippin'.
Asked how Diaz is doing in the wake of her recent split from Justin Timberlake, Slater profoundly said:
"She's doing well."
Slater, an eight-time world champion surfer, and Diaz were spotted catching some waves together in Hawaii last month. Her ex, meanwhile, has been spotted getting cozy with Scarlett Johansson on more than one occasion.
The odds of JT and CD getting back together are pretty much as high as those of Howard K. Stern actually being the father of Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern.