While Britney Spears has been hitting the floor hard when she passes out drunk at clubs, Kevin Federline has been hitting the single scene with a vengeance now that he's a bachelor again.
But FedEx doesn't always achieve the level of success he might like.
According to Us Weekly, the aspiring rapper texted annoying, alcoholic actress Lindsay Lohan, who he met earlier this fall (pictured). His text message:
"We should hang out."
He's a smooth operator. The invite went over about as well as his album, Playing With Fire.
"She was totally grossed out," a Lohan pal claims.
"She thought it was hilarious," says another.
THG NOTE: Lindsay Lohan has friends? Who knew!
It gets better. Federline, who's been warring with Britney and friends on MySpace, wasn't just turned down by LL. He was straight up b!tch slapped via text when Lindsay replied:
"Why would I hang out with you?"
Kevin then retaliated with another text in which he called her "firecrotch." Awesome. Brandon Davis should really be getting royalties every time something like this happens.
Lohan's friend's take on the whole situation was comical.
"She couldn't believe he was so pathetic. She doesn't want him using her to make Britney jealous," the gal pal dished.
Oh well. At least K-Fed has a core group of supporters - like Cris Judd and Shaq - comfort him when he's down and out. And hey, he can always go online and see a Lindsay Lohan crotch shot if he wants.
Both were in Miami to ring in 2007, but Lohan avoided Federline like the plague at Mansion nightclub on New Year's Eve. Federline reportedly kissed a mystery blonde named Rebecca. How much he paid this "Rebecca," and whether he tried to holler at Kristin Cavallari, who was also there, was not reported.
Meanwhile, Britney Spears "fell asleep" at her own party in Las Vegas. But you probably already knew about that by now. The girl's tired!