Why post on MySpace when you can go back and forth over Instant Messenger?
Indeed, TMZ has somehow obtained the online transcript of a recent exchange between insane person, Anna Nicole Smith, and her probable baby's daddy, Larry Birkhead.
We've posted it below, replete with spelling errors that make Courtney Love look like an English professor. Enjoy:

Anna Nicole: quit trash me at the casino
Larry: not at a casino
Anna Nicole: go f**k my mom to
Anna Nicole: Yall are sick
Larry: show up for the test with the baby\
Anna Nicole: don't think so
Anna Nicole: u wish
Larry: everybody just want u to do right thing is all
Anna Nicole: in your dreams
So many questions to consider from this Internet chat: Are their screen names really as boring as "Anna Nicole" and "Larry?" Will Smith's lawyers successfully block the court-mandated paternity test?
Will we ever see Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern pictures? Will the baby have to change her name once Birkhead is announced at the father?
Is Anna Nicole Smith nuttier than Janice Dickinson?
Some things we may never find out.























February 8th, 2007 11:44 PM
I would blame Howard K. Stern before I would blame Larry Birkhead. Howard was around Anna all the time and he knew how bad her drug problem was yet he continued to let her use and abuse. If he really loved her he should have gotten her help a long time ago! She needed an intervention, she needed re-hab.Larry is not a bad person, he just wanted what is rightly his, to be able to see his baby on a regular basis.
February 9th, 2007 3:14 PM
H0ward has always had Annas best interest f0r years. S0me0ne t0t0ally clueless, 0r fr0m Birkheads camp,... I can see where/h0w that statement ab0ut H0ward being t0 blame c0ming ab0ut.
February 9th, 2007 11:21 PM
Anna's mother is the most unloving, cold mother I've ever seen. The woman continues after her daughters death to bad mouth her, while showing absolutly no pain for her death. At no time before or after Ann's passing has this woman ever had anything good to say about her daughter. No pride in her sucess, nothing. It is easy to understand why Anna left home at a young age. Now here comes grandma after Anna's baby which stands to inherit millions. I hope someone protects this child from her since it seems no one was able to protect Anna from from this heartless, disgusting sub human.
February 10th, 2007 1:48 PM
The only person to blame is Anna Nicole herself. She was a self-destructive bomb ready to explode any time. She knew it too, telling her hairstylist she would end up like Marilyn Monroe. I can't believe you all out there are trying to blame others for a grown woman. She had a mind, even though a lot of us might thing otherwise, but she made the decisions that led up to her ultimate fate. Lastly, has anyone thought about the quality of medical she received in the Bahamas? Didn't she have a C-section with her daughter? I wonder how that surgery, along with her immense depression over her son's death contributed to her death?
February 10th, 2007 2:53 PM
I'm not from Birkheads camp and I'm not clueless. If Howard gave a damn about Anna he would have made her get help a long time ago.If my mate was strung out on pills I would insist on getting him help and I would not give up. Yes, Anna was a grown woman and the people around addicts are called inablers.If you really love someone you help that person get help not self-destruct.
February 14th, 2007 2:21 AM
This baby should have the right to know who her father is,,If my son died I would surely die with him..our bond is so strong that I wouldn't see a need to move on in this life..I had a terrible dysfunctional childhood,,doesn't matter how much you try to deprogram yourself,,,it sneaks up on you,,,and you are bitter,,I have struggled with drugs and alcohol for years,,,on and off..it's just what the Universe has in store for you that matters...good luck in trying to blame anyone..she is with her son and in peace..you can't change God's plan..and all that matters now is the baby and her future...Lori
February 16th, 2007 1:35 AM
I have watched as everyone else has all the news on TV. Almost all of the programs say they know nothing about Larry Birkhead. I can't believe they can find out all the secrets about medications, affidavits, etc. and can't find out anything about Larry Birkhead. I'm sure if they wanted to know about him they could. Maybe they can't find any bad stuff so there is no need to say anything. I do know he has always had a job and always had his own money. I know he didn't have to live off of anyone. He has done very well on his own.
I have known Larry since birth. HE IS NOT A RELATIVE OF MINE. However, I do know of him and his family. Larry has a twin brother that has 2 children, 1 sister with 2 children and another sister with 1 child. They all love their children and would do anything to protect them. Larry has cared for these kids on different occasions with their parents feeling very confident that he would take care of them as if they were his own. He interacts well with children. Everyone is saying that he is just after the money, if that were so why would he be asking for DNA testing that would definitely prove either he is or is not the father? He would be like HKS and trying to dodge and stop the DNA testing. I know if Larry is the father he will be a wonder, caring, protective father, money or no money. I do know from one of his sisters that in the beginning Larry only wanted visitation rights with his daughter. When he was told that wasn't going to happen and when he found out drugs were being taken by ANS, he wanted to know for sure if he was the father and wanted to take the proper steps to protect this child in case he was her father. Everyone knows drugs will be passed to the body of the unborn child. This will cause the child to go though withdrawal and in some instances cause health problems and sometime mental problems. Very early detection is the key to helping children that fall in this situation. I think everyone will see that if Larry is not the father, you won't hear from him again. I not so sure that will be true of HKS.
I would like to ask 2 questions. What has happened to the 2 dogs Anna had and are they with someone who will care for them like she did?
By Ruth
February 16th, 2007 3:53 AM
Ruth, I saw the dogs on E.T.(on T.V.) during HKS' interview after he got back to their house in the Bahamas.
I totally agree with what you say about Larry and i truly believe that he IS the dad. Dannilynn has his eyes. Larry is the only person in this insane mess that would have only Dannilynns best interest at heart. This whole thing is so very tragic and now they continue to drag Anna through the mud and everyone seems to be cashing in bigtime. The hearings on the custody of her body are a joke. That judge is a moron that should be thrown off the bench. He's a media whore just like the guy that did the autopsy. As far as the remains, it's a no brainer. She should be buried beside her son. Everyone knows that is where she wants to be. For the judge to drag this out for days is just ridiculous!And Vergie needs to take her ass back to the trailer park she can out of and stay there. She should be ashamed of herself.Anna despised that woman and she knows it. If anyone is after Anna's money it's her.Another thing, everyones always talking about the money. Anna still had not recieved a dime. Thehearings have been going on for years and it will probably continue to go on for years and no one knows if her estate will ever get that money.I just Hope Howard is forced to have Dannilynn take the DNA test soon. It;s vital to the baby's mental health.The older she gets the more tramatic it will be for her if she is awarded to someone else and has to be uprooted and taken away from the only people she has ever known. name 2 K
February 21st, 2007 8:15 PM
I literally cannot believe what I have watched and more so that people actually believe and buy into this nonsense -- just today Anna Nicole's (birthmother) brought with her to (what was suppose to be a very respectful, sad viewing of her daughter; the sorry slob brings the media... and if her blatant lying wasn't enough she all the sudden doesn't know English? uh uh can you say that again; what part of DID YOU RECEIVE MONEY can someone not understand... I believe the judge has either a vested interest in Larry Birkhead or watched the sorry television shows... how can he just pick on Howard (the one person who has been a constant in Anna's life.... he (if someone cares to watch the Anna Nicole Show) you would notice that he if fact convinced Anna to see her cousin after her cousin sold her out; as have all of her family.... These people are sick...
And may I ask if Larry Birkhead and everyone else who says how much Howard was the reason for Anna's (Doctor Prescribed Medication)... LARRY BIRKHEAD is just as to blame as (let's see everyone else who is or claims to be in her life) they cared so much and have done nothing...but we can all blame that on Howard right -- according to Birkhead he WATCHED Howard give her medicine, well dumb ass; she is supposedly pregnant with your child in a hospital I can highly doubt you would just sit there... (you can literally tell he has been coached into saying every word that comes out of his dumb mouth) - and his attorney that sorry women (she is just getting what she truly wants and that is one thing Media attention, she was smiling after Anna Nicole died, but during testimony from Vergie (all I want is money and to be on TV Arthur) Debra HOEPRI was crying --- was she doing this before or after she turned around to make sure the cameras were watching..... I swear these people can turn on the tears in seconds mainly Vergie - that woman sickens me.... I don't feel bad for her, and I can't believe they allow evidence that Howard is trying to explain was stolen from their home (they have this evidence) but yet it's allowed into evidence and no one is arrested... there is something very wrong here... and did anyone ever think the possibility that someone else had this done; let's see they have stolen this evidence they have which proves they are in fact criminals; so this (if anything other than an illness caused Anna's death; maybe I and believe we are looking at the wrong people...
So to sum that part up, bring on the fake tears, the lies that you literally have scripted, and let's make the one person who cared for Anna and they had arrangements that not all can understand but it's really not up to people who don't know or are simply in this for the money to...
One more comment: Larry Birkhead is one thing and one thing only a man or sorry looking man looking for scandal (we all do realize that he is THE PAPARAZZI! So if a Paparazzi person came along and said I am the father of Angelina Jolie's daughter, well maybe she is not the best person to compare (seeing how she was 5 months pregnant before Brad and Jennifer Anistons divorce... but really come on
I truly hope that Anna Nicole can ask God to help her through this and that she may be put to rest with her son Daniel... without these people who do not care about her…
Oh I forgot one thing; we see how Vergie Auther brought the media with her to her daughters viewing and is paid for all of this and hasn't seen her own daughter in 10 years if not longer, using evidence that was stolen from her daughters home â€" and Larry Birkhead has teamed up with this women; I think that would if anything give you a character on what they truly looking for and it is most definitely not what is in the best interest of Anna Nicole or Dannilynn… they are interested in one thing and one thing only and that would be MONEY… as proved just today, that she brought a Journalist to a very private moment for her daughter…. That women she been thrown out of the court amongst the rest of her sorry (can't understand law partners) another fact: the lawyers are being paid by the media and this is all to exploit a person who had dreams but because of people like them, her (Anna Nicole) and her son Daniel are no longer with us….
February 22nd, 2007 8:10 AM
Moe, I am with you one hundred percent. Everything you say is true. And when you say the media exploited Anna and was a major contributor to her death, if not the REAL REASON for her death, I believe you are correct again.
Can you say, "TMZ?" They are the real rats behind all of this.