Lindsay Lohan Hurts Her Firecrotch

One would think that Lindsay Lohan has enough experience with hard objects between her legs that she'd be impervious to pain there.

However, the actress with the most firey crotch in Hollywood recent injured her nether regions during a typical Saturday night training for an upcoming role.

In another e-mail somehow uncovered by Page Six, Lohan takes a break from threatening Lindsay Ratowski.

Instead, she tells friends that she's practicing for her role as a stripper in her next film, I Know Who Killed Me, and that three hours of pole dancing rendered her a "walking black-and-blue mark."

Fortuneately, the woman who apparently needs some lessons from Britney Spears, provides even more anatomical detail:

"We're talkin' like, UPPER AND INNER THIGH ACTION-bruised ... I didn't know it was actually possible to have bruises in such areas of the body."

We know we talk about Lindsay Lohan's crotch a lot. But now we're just relaying words straight from the wanna-be stripper's mouth.

Moreover - as proven by her choice of words to describe these ladies - Lohan also has newfound respect for the profession in her email: "Strippers dude, I tell you, I really respect the c***s now ... I'm not going to lie to ya."

Phew. At least Lindsay isn't gonna lie. And at least her boobs appear to be okay.