A few weeks back, we took a look inside the brain of a poor, pathetic pooch practically being tortured by Paris Hilton. The other day, we showed you exactly what Paris Hilton's pussy was thinking. Now, it's time we got a glimpse of what goes on in the very small, one-track mind of the hotel heiress herself.

Yes. While she feigns interest at her canine companion, who chows down on some sort of beef or pork product, Paris can't keep her mind out of the gutter -- and how she wouldn't mind being porked by that beefcake Stavros Niarchos.

But alas. While Paris and the Greek God of Poontang may have had a thing going in the past, he's nowhere to be found on this day. Nor is her "#2 Option," Travis Barker. No, sadly, Paris and her pup remain alone, deep in thought.