Anna Nicole Smith: The Red Menace

Yikes.

Anna Nicole Smith has a lot of problems these days. Most recently, her power was turned off at home.

Before that, the former Playboy model was worried that her son Daniel's soul was stuck in the afterlife. And we all know how awkward that can be.

Then, of course, there's that whole baby daddy thing. Is it Howard K. Stern? Larry Birkhead? A myriad of other contenders?

Perhaps worst of all, however, is that Anna will always look like she does below. Granted, she'll be able to pick up shopping bags without her twig-like arms breaking off (sorry, Nicole Richie), but she'll also scare children under the age of 10.