Michael Jackson Ranch Catches Fire

Strangely enough, it's not the sort of fire that accompanies accusations of touching little boys.

Instead, Neverland Ranch - the well-known abode of Michael Jackson - was threatened by a wildfire Friday.

The blaze burned 40 acres on the ranch and came within a quarter of a mile of the main house. Somewhere, despite their foreclosure problems, Michael's parents were pleased they were far away.

One hundred firefighters battled the fire, with an assist from water-dropping choppers.

Jackson, of course, is disgusting and crazy. He's also been out of the country for months, setting up residence in Bahrain.

There was no word on the origin or cause of the fire - but Lindsay Lohan's crotch is being brought in for questioning.