Paris Hilton Purchases More Pets; Animals Worldwide Consider Mass Suicide

Paris Hilton says she'd make a great mother because she's very good with animals. As if to prove her point - and cause Captain Kangaroo to turn in his grave - the nitwit purchased a parrot and kitten from Bird Kingdom & Pet Shop in Santa Monica this week.

Hilton, of course, made her chihuahua famous during seasons of The Simple Life; although many viewers had difficulty telling the tiny dog apart from Nicole Richie.

Us Weekly has provided the following image for fans to decide the real issue at stake here: what the heck did these animals do to deserve such a fate?