Lohan Password Stolen, Paris Blamed, Gossip Rags Rejoice

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Forget other examples of the Paris Hilton/Lindsay Lohan feud - fake laughing and kicking is NOTHING compared to this.

Brace yourself, readers, because someone has stolen Lohan's Blackberry password! Those in the fiery, spoiled redhead's camp? They blame a certain blonde, skinny, attention/food starved hotel heiress.

What a Frickin' Wreck

Lohan's rep, Leslie Sloane Zelnik, said the immoral individual in question sent Lindsay's friends "disgusting and very mean messages." Well, at this this person didn't party them to death.

"Everyone thought were coming from Lindsay. They weren't. We now have her lawyers looking into it. Some people think Paris may have been involved because the wording of the messages sounds very familiar," said Zelnik.

In other words, every other event was referred to as "hot" and every message signed by "an overused human condom."

Ironically, Hilton suffered through her own messaging incident two years ago when her T-Mobile was hacked into and her private messages were put on the Web - including ones saying [then married] Jessica Simpson had a crush on Justin Timberlake.

Hilton's rep, Elliot Mintz, denies the awful waste of space had anything to do with Lohan's BlackBerry difficulties.

"I'm saddened this happened to Lindsay. I lived through this with Paris two years ago when her Sidekick was hacked into, and the loss of privacy is unbearable. But as for any suggestion that Paris would have anything to do with this, that is silly, untrue and unfortunate."

Studies actually show the only event more unbearable than losing one's privacy for a bit is listening to Kevin Federline rap.

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Paris is waaay too stupid to do something like this. Hacking into a Blackberry takes some form of intelligence, which we all know that Parasite does NOT have. All she knows how to do is screw, starve herself, shop, and flash that rotten crotch. So I do not think Parasite Herpes is responsible for this.